Jellyfish are Taking Over the Ocean!
Despite their pacific sounding name (pun intended) jellyfish are quickly becoming a threat to other ocean life and to human beings. See the harrowing report on how many giant, icky jellyfish are propagating off the coast of Japan, and how deadly the sting of the box jellyfish can be. Did you know that 500,000 people per year are stung by jellyfish in the Chesapeak Bay? I didn't even know that many people swam in the bay. It seems like a 100% guarantee that if you go swimming in the bay you will become just another statitic.
Clearly this is a job for government intervention, and the answer is not just throwing dollars at the problem (the jellyfish will just eat them). No, the US of A must recruit the only known weapon against this menace:
Nick at Night, send us Spongebob so we can sleep at night!
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