I Made these MLB Second Half Predictions on July 19th, 2013

1. Miguel Cabrera wins the Triple Crown.

2. Andy Pettitte retires before season's end.  Claims he's doing it for the good of the team. Truth is he wants to get into the Hall of Fame and he's ERA can't get to 3.90.  It's inching up after every start.

3. Derek Jeter will go on the DL two more times before calling it a season.

4. The Pirates will not be in the post-season.

5. Bryce Harper will not hit .300 (ever).

6. Luis Cruz will become a boxer.

7. Matt Harvey will sleep with more women than Jeter.

8. Robin Ventura will be fired.

9. The Cardinals and the Red Sox will play in the World Series.

10. Big Papi will be the World Series MVP.

A Weird Thing About the MLB Suspensions

Did anyone else notice that every single player who was suspended by MLB for PED use is...Norwegian? Not a single Lilliputian, and no one from Atlantis either.

I mean, what is it about coming from Norwegia that would cause otherwise very capable athletes to risk their health, careers and reputation?  I think when you come from such a poor area as Norwegia, especially some of the islands in the Scanty Navel Sea, it is actually a fairly rational choice: if you use PEDs and improve your stats you can be in line for a huge contract, the dollar amounts of which will probably take care of future generations of your particular Norwegians.

I don't think a 50 game suspension will really discourage other Norwegians from trying.  I am more concerned that they will look for even less reputable sources for their PEDs.

Too Much Parity in Baseball?

I have always been annoyed by the fact that so many teams make the playoffs in the National Hockey League. The regular season in any sport that concludes with a playoff season should winnow out the mediocre teams. The end result should be the best teams fighting for the national championship. This system has been mostly satisfactory in baseball except for the last decade or so. What has happened is that teams with less money to spend, particularly the so-called small market teams, have been unable to field truly competitive teams. The Pittsburgh Pirates and Kansas City Royals come to mind.

In 2011 it seems that Major League Baseball has reached the goal of parity. As of this writing (June 8, 2011) the last place Baltimore Orioles are only 5 and ½ games out of first place, the same number of games that separate the top three contenders in the two other Al Divisions. The same applies for the NL East and Central Division, where 5 and ½ games separate the top three teams; in the NL West this separates the top four teams.

Now, this by itself is not so dramatic. It is not unusual for the top two or three teams to be clustered near the lead. Where the drama comes in is when you examine the Wild Card standings. Take the NL Wild Card, for example. The New York Mets, despite all their woes are only 4 and ½ games out of the Wild Card lead. At this stage of the season, with not even the first half of it being completed, there are a potential of 11 teams in contention, if you believe a 7 game deficit can be erased in 3 and ½ months. The American League Wild Card is similar, where 8 teams are in possible contention. What this means is that in the National League all but two teams have some decent chance of entering the playoffs; in the American League all but three have that chance.

In the big picture, this is good for baseball. More fans who think their teams have a chance will continue to attend games, providing more revenue to the teams. It will be interesting to see how this affects trades, however. Take the Mets again, for example. All talk has been about the possible need to trade Jose Reyes, Carlos Beltran and Francisco Rodriguez to cut payroll. New York’s sport talk radio is filled with debates about the cost and benefits of possible trades involving these players. The assumption is that the Mets are going nowhere and should get the best value to build for the future. The consensus among fans and talking heads is that the Mets should hold on to Reyes and trade the other two, particularly Beltran.

But wait a minute; the Mets are only 4 and ½ games out of first place in the Wild Card. Their season has been one of ups and downs, but for the most part they’ve been able to smooth the cycle and stay near .500. Why should they give up in late July if they are within the same striking distance? Teams with less talent (arguably the 1973 Mets), were able to make up even bigger deficits to reach the top. Why trade for the future if the future is now? I don’t envy Sandy Alderson’s position but he can thank the apparent parity for giving him these difficult choices.

Do You Have What It Takes...

to work at Taco Bell?

(from Business Week)

"With me on the line are Carmen Franco, 60, and Ricardo Alvarez, 36. The best Food Champions can prepare about 100 burritos, tacos, chalupas, and gorditas in less than half an hour, and they have the 78-item menu memorized. Franco and Alvarez are a precise and frighteningly fast team. Ten orders at a time are displayed on a screen above the line, five drive-thrus and five walk-ins. Franco is a blur of motion as she slips out wrapping paper and tortillas, stirs, scoops, and taps, then slides the items down the line while looking up at the screen. The top Food Champions have an ability to scan through the next five orders and identify those that require more preparation steps, such as Grilled Stuffed Burritos and Crunchwrap Supremes, and set those up before returning to simpler tacos and burritos. When Alvarez is bogged down, Franco slips around him and slides Crunchwrap Supremes into their boxes. For this adroit time management and manual dexterity, Taco Bell starts its workers at $8.50 an hour, $1.25 more than minimum wage."

Memorized 72 menu items! I bet they dream in Taco Bell colors.

Sombrero tip to Marginalrevolution.com

Hope He Doesn't Get Bent Out of Shape

I didn't know this but apparently celebrity-yogi Bikram Choudhury had patents out on some of his Hot Yoga moves. What a creep. If you teach any of "his" poses you have to pay him a fee. I thought these were in the public domain since Yoga has been around for a few thousand years. Leave it to our money grubbing western mentality to have a twisted mind like Choudhury get patents. But the Indian government is sticking it to him big time by putting over 1,300 yoga asanas online. All those poses are considered to be in the public domain and therefore unpatentable. Here's one pose that Choudhury can still patent:

Pet Peeve of the Month

Here's something that gets my gourd: imitations of the Beatles' Abbey Road album cover. How I wish they had patented that and never allowed anyone to use it. Their prodiction was iconic and eternal; anything after has been mere pretentious imitation. Please, please "creative types", could we have a moratorium on Abbey Road rip offs?

First photo: stupid. Second photo: These people didn't even have the decency to look straight ahead.






Doing Abbey Road imitations has become the tourist equivalent of sticking your head inside a cannon.

Celebrity Get Out of Jail Free Card

If you do the crime, be a celeberity, so you don't have to do the time.

Why You WIll Never Eat Dumplings Again, Ever

I'va always loved dumplings, especially as part of a dim sum dinner. Having learned this, I'll either have to stop eating dumplings or re-frame myself as some kind of food connoiseur.

And, to stay on the theme of food, at least I stay away from some of the exotic food that has a high rate of being undercooked, thereby resulting in contamination.

A good reason to get psychotherapy

If only my insurance covered this:

America the Fattiful

I'd like to see a chart that shows the number of dollars spent on all sorts of diet and exercise services and equipment - from books, to pills, to gym membeships - next to this chart of how we Americans have become major league fatties. There is something very schizoid about the way we can move in two entirely opposite directions.