A large man who lived and worked in the San Francisco Bay area was fired yesterday by his employer, a company normally known by the first letter of the alphabet. This large man was purported to have shared a golden thong with other workers at his previous job, which was with a competing business in the same industry in New York City. The official reason for his firing was his poor performance, although other large men who comment on this industry said his poor performance might have been the result of drug use. This large man had previously done commercials for underarm deodorants, but it is not certain that this line of work is still available to him. It is rumored that another competing business in this industry may wish to hire hime. They are quoted as saying they could "use his stick", which might help them reach their ultimate goal of jumping on each other on a dirt mound and then running inside and spraying liquor into each other's faces.
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