Friday, July 31, 2009

Prof. Henry Louis Gates, Jr. Arrested Again by Same Officer

AP News

In a shocking turn of events, Prof. Henry Louis Gates, Jr., arrested at his own home as a result of a 911 call reporting a prowler, was rearrested in Washington by Police Officer James Crowley, the same officer who arrested him in Cambridge. Both Gates and Crowley were invited by President Barack Obama to the White House to reconcile over a beer.

According to Officer Crowley, he was approaching the White House on Pennsylvania Avenue when he saw a man with a beer can inside a paper bag. "Clearly this is illegal in any jurisdiction", said Crowley. I saw the concealed liquor inside the bag, near the White House, and my law enforcement instincts kicked in. I immediately wrestled the perp to the ground and put the cuffs on him."

Enraged by this latest indignity, Professor Gates, through his lawyer issued the following statement. "What the fuck!"

Alarmed by the news, President Obama tried to calm both sides by offering a peaceful sit-down at the White House. "This time it will not be BYOB and maybe we'll smoke a joint, I don't know." Prof. Gates is rumored to be considering changing his first name to Bill to, as he said, "Get some respect from the Man."

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